There nothing last….

I don't know what I should do at this moment. It seems pretty hard to understand what is really happening out there. Once upon a time, I can simply breathe the same air; I can speak the same language. However, at this moment, they had change. You are standing too far… I can't see you anymore. I wonder how nothing last.

I've been looking for very long time but for the time being, there is something is not working. Something missing likes incomplete part. Or it is a sign that I am the one who ignorance. I'm performing loser. I play dumb on purpose. I'm so sick. I'm missed the sign. Cannot turn back to read because I think it's too late... because I'm not that smart to understand. I just don't know how to be in that way because it's not my thing. I wonder how nothing last...

In the blink of eyes, we lost everything, they are gone; Love, life, money, pride, confidence is blow away. Hey~ listen!! Never choose to stay in the safe zone because you start losing everything. Do not choose to stay still watching the world moving because they never waiting for you because nothing last man… You better not talking because it's not working. I'm going nowhere hence its end tonight.... nothing last forever… I'm losing grip... I wonder how nothing last...

you can say no… say no… say no… and say no…I don't care... what should I?

Allah Hu Rabbi. I think it is the best time for me to look for some sign. I don't want to make my move. I want to play deaf and blind. I want to say yes all the time. Indeed, only Allah knows what inside there. I want to stay still. No backward, no forward. Let the world move on its own. I just want to watch from the dark spot. I wonder how nothing last...

Ya Allah, I'm the sinner who make a thousand of mistake. I know what is happening at this moment just because of my bad deed. Forgive me Ya Allah. One thing I know, I want to quit playing this game. I can bear all the consequences. Tonight, last siren buzz. We'll see.. I wonder how nothing last...

Heart never sing a same song. sometimes, they sing out loud, while the other time, they just imitate. Ice turn to be water, rock turn to be dust, wind turn to be storm , heart turn to be soul... and me turn to be the one with no heart.....

Call me complicated... call me freak.. erm~ it's me lol... I'm always love to be in conflict because I born with the brain damaged. I don't afraid of nothing except for My Creator. All this time, I cried because of Him. not because i'm scared, not because I'm lossing thing, not because unhappy, not because I weak. No! never. I cried because I I wonder how nothing last... and I pray to Allah to give me some strength to finish what I'd started.


I'm hurting people for being me. I'm sorry for that. I wonder how nothing last...I wonder how nothing last except for this feeling... I choose to feel this way forever.

"La haula wala quwata illa billahil aliyyil azim"

tiada ada daya yang lebih agung melainkan kuasa Allah- ** dan akulah hanya makhluk yang lemah.

song for this post...

One More Time

each day is so slow and so hard

because no matter how hard i try to reveal my heart

you can’t see it

i’m just resent the time that’s gone by

no matter how much time changes, i’m always sad

one more time

even though it hurt, i should have loved a little more

i’ll laugh for only you, i’ll cry for only you

one more time

like the hot sun of the sky

i’ll love all of you forever, only you

one more time

i miss the image of the warmhearted you standing beneath the umbrella

though i wipe these tears again, i’m always sad

one more time

even though it hurt, i should have loved a little more

i’ll laugh for only you, i’ll cry for only you

one more time

like the stars that shine brightly in the night sky

i’ll love all of you forever, only you

one more time

i promise that a tomorrow that we both share will find us

i promise that a happiness that we both share will find us

i’ll always be by your side

one more time

even though it hurt, i should have loved a little more

i’ll laugh for only you, i’ll cry for only you

one more time

like the hot sun of the sky

i’ll love all of you forever, only you

one more time oh my love for you

oh one more time oh my love for you

one more time